Thursday, December 17, 2020

17 Game Regular Season Is A Go...Sort Of. NFL Week 15 Preview


Yesterday, the NFL owners approved the formula that would determine the 17th regular season game for next season or whenever they decide to add it to the schedule. It will "be an interconference match-up based on divisional standings on a rotating divisional basis" like how a AFC division plays a different NFC division every year on a four year rotation. Ideally this will generate more marquee interconference matchups that are normally limited to only playing out every four years on the schedule.

Originally, this was intended to be the international game where teams play a neutral site game in a foreign location like London, Mexico, Canada, Germany, etc. But thanks to Corona, those plans are on hold and they have to figure out who gets the extra home game because I doubt they will play in areas that don't have professional football like Hawaii, Omaha, San Antonio, Birmingham, etc.

Another sticking point according to PFT is whether to play two or three preseason games. Two preseason games along with two bye weeks with only teams coming off a bye to be scheduled for Thursday Night Football makes the most sense. But as you know, common sense doesn't exist in this world. Owners Robert Kraft, Jerry Jones, John Mara and Art Rooney II don't want to give up that extra game, especially after taking massive hits in ticket, parking and concession revenue this year due to the shutdowns. To sum it up, we know teams will play 17 regular season games, we just don't know when they will do it or will they up it to 18 games to satisfy owners who want that 9th home game every year instead of every other year.


THE GAMES






Los Angeles Chargers    0
Las Vegas Raiders         23

It's the battle between a underperforming team vs a fraudulent team that just dumped their defensive coordinator for giving up 40+ points in two of the last three games. It might be too late considering they have to hope the 8-5 Dolphins and Ravens falter so they can leapfrog them for the brand new Wildcard spot. Winning is easy, hoping others lose is the hard part!




Buffalo Bills          23
Denver Broncos   21

Drew Lock threw a career high 4 TDs last week in a 32-27 win. Of course, it was against a shitty Panthers team so it was practically like beating themselves. They have the Bills this week who added another loss to the Steelers record Sunday Night. You know how this will go but at least former XFL kicker Taylor Russolino will start thanks to Pat McAfee so good on him.     


Carolina Panthers       17
Green Bay Packers     26

Speaking of the Panthers, they play the Packers in the second game of this Saturday doubleheader. I expect Aaron Rodgers to sling the ball and pad his stats since they already clinched the NFC North so he can get that third MVP award. He's 4th in passing yards (3,685), 1st in TDs (39), has a passer rating of 119.7 and only threw 4 interceptions and sacked 13 times. I'd say he has a damn good case for the MVP award!




Arizona 49ers of San Francisco   41
Dallas Cowboys of Arlington        21

Andy Dalton got his revenge against his old team going 16/23 for 185 and 2 TDs in a 30-7 win vs the Bengals. It was a nice win but the good vibes will be short lived as they host the 49ers traveling team. Certainly a loss here will officially end their playoff hopes right?



Seattle Seahawks       23
OG Nameless Team    24

Division leader Washington is the last NFC East team with a loss to spare in their Road to 8. This will be a tough matchup vs the 9-4 Seahawks so they have to hope their 4th ranked defense can contain Russell Wilson long enough for their 30th ranked offense do actually do something productive. Whoever's starting at QB better take advantage of the Seahawks' 27th ranked defense while he still has a chance before DangeRuss breaks loose.


Chicago Bears           7
Minnesota Vikings    27

It's a cold world for Kickers. If a QB throws 4 interceptions, he had a bad game. If a receiver drops four balls, he gets another shot at redemption in the next game. But if a kicker misses three goals and a extra point, they're ready to cut his ass. Kickers suddenly sucking for a stretch of games is a fairly common thing that happens to all of them (including Punters). So "we'll see" if they stick with him or bring in another Kicker for these final games.


New England Patriots    20
Miami Dolphins              10

When asked about changing QB's Bill Belichick says "We're not there right now". At 6-7 the Patriots will miss the playoffs so you would think they want to see what they have in Jarrett Stidham instead of sticking with a underwhelming Cam Newton. They can't tank for anyone but they could at least figure out if Stidham will be their future QB or not. Even when you do get the players back who skipped out on this season next year, they still need to know who their QB will be. Cam is not a long term solution so if Stidham is not the answer either, they better get a QB who IS the answer to go along with their returning talent.


Jacksonville Jaguars    27
Baltimore Ravens          20

The Ravens win over the Browns was more dramatic than it had any right to be when Lamar Jackson left the game late due to "cramping". Whether he had the cramps or had the runs he came back to lead them down the field for a game winning Justin Tucker field goal. It would be so disheartening for their playoff chances to get crushed by a tanking one win Jaguars team. 




Tompa Bay Buccaneers   21
Atlanta Falcons                 49

So...the Bucs are without their Kicker, Punter, and Long Snapper. That's problematic. Not as problematic as playing a game without a QB but it's still something you would hate to deal with considering they're hanging on to that second Wildcard spot by a thread. The simulation, knowing this, predicts the Falcons will pick the bones of this specialistless team for a easy win.



Detroit Lions            24
Tennessee Titans    35

I like many football fans asked when heard of the news of Lions' Center Frank Ragnow's injury, "HOW THE HELL YOU FRACTURE YOUR THROAT!!!". Did a D-lineman throat strike him on the line? Did a stray foot or elbow catch him under the facemask when he or someone else was falling down? Doctors say that a fractured throat is trauma to the larynx that can disrupt respiration, swallowing and phonation. Thankfully Ragnow isn't having those problems even though he's not supposed to talk right now as they figure out how to get him back on field. Just think, hockey fans love to brag about how tough their players are and how football players are a bunch of diva pussies. Well I like to see a hockey player complete a game with a fractured larynx at a position he has to talk every time he's out on the ice!



Houston Texans       24
Indianapolis Colts    23

Even diehard Texans fans would admit this is a lost season for their team. That wont stop Romeo Crennel from trotting out Deshaun Watson to play these pointless games behind a porous O-line that allowed him to be sacked 39 times this season and 164 times in his four year career. While Crennel is coaching for a possible permanent head coaching gig here, Watson has his reasons to play these last three games as well. Despite the record, he's on pace to set career highs in completion percentage, passing yards per game, TD-INT ratio and passer rating so that's all the incentive he needs to play out the rest of the season. It also couldn't hurt to fuck over a division rival's chances of a playoff spot as well.


Philadelphia Eagles     31
Arizona Cardinals        17

The Eagles shocked everyone when they beat the playoff bound Saints 24-21 Sunday. Like, where the hell was THIS team all season? Sure, Drew Brees wasn't playing but this team was lifeless all season until Jalen Hurts started. He went 17/30 for 167 and a TD in the air and added 18 rushes for 106 yards. That nice statline earned him his second start, this time vs a Cardinals team that's desperately holding on to that final Wildcard spot. I hope it doesn't happen for the sake of a 8 win representative out of this division but Hurts has the chance to keep their hope alive till the end of the season.



New York Jets            24
Los Angeles Rams    13

I don't know how. I don't know why? But the simulation has the winless Jets defeating the NFC West leading Rams. Maybe it saw that Sam Darnold REALLY wants to remain a Jet (is he a masochist?) and feels he will play his best game this season vs...the league's #1 defense.





Kansas City Chiefs     30
New Orleans Saints    23

Drew Brees is back and they didn't flex this game to Sunday Night? Those CBS executives caught a break there. Anyway, the Chiefs look to hold on to that lone 1st round bye as the Saints try to clinch the NFC South with a win. Looks like Who Dat Nation will have to wait another week for them do that.



Cleveland Browns     27
New York Giants        20

Why is a 5 win Giants team playing the Browns on Sunday Night? Because 2020 doesn't give a fuck about your feelings that's why. Giants' Offensive coordinator Jason Garrett tested positive for Coronavirus so TE coach Freddie Kitchens will call plays in his place. He will get the chance to call plays against his old team but he's not the only former Brown on this team. If Daniel Jones can't play (Why the hell did they rush a clearly hobbled bum QB out there?), then former Brown QB Colt McCoy will start. Too bad they're gonna lose this revenge game, they need to keep pace with Football Team for them to still have a shot at the division tittle.



Pittsburgh Steelers    30
Cincinnati Bengals      6

The Steelers went from undefeated with a first round bye to 2 loses and play one of three opening AFC playoff games with the other schmucks. My have time changed. Whatever funk they're in, they better get out of it or they will lose out on the AFC North title and be forced to play on the road in these playoffs.


LAST WEEK      13-3
OVERALL       120-86-1

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